Starbucks by the Numbers

Posted by at 4:49PM

“Starbucks: It’s NOT Meyer”

I have a love-hate relationship with Starbucks. On the one hand, I downright refuse to use the term “Tall” to order the establishment’s smallest serving of coffee. Ditto “Grande” (meaning “large” in Italian, according to my friend Google Translate) to order a medium-ish size. Ditto “Venti” for an all-nighter-inducing sized cup. Ok, admittedly the last one does make a smidge more sense than the other two – apparently a “Venti” is, in fact, twenty ounces of fluid. But seriously, for a company that has 20,400 almost identical stores, you’d think they’d adopt a similar level of consistency (if not common sense) when it comes to their sizing practices.

On the other hand, however, they do brew a pretty decent cup of coffee. I also like their little cheese and fruit boxes. And, most importantly, I have learned to love the establishment for their work environment. And by that I mean the environment in which I do MY work. This year’s fall course guide spent about a week and a half gestating in a Starbucks across the street from the Monterey Bay Aquarium, and ever since I have had a certain fondness for the institution’s mass-produced ambiance. I can’t tell if its the “handcrafted” wooden tables, good lighting, endless outlets, or simply the fact that it’s not Meyer, but I’ve found that I’m surprisingly productive working in a place with heavy foot-traffic and lots of people hyped-up on mocha frappucinos. As such, I’ve spent a great deal of time in Tressider’s latest installment, enjoying both the salted carmel lattes and the sublime people watching that comes with them. So, without further ado, I present to you Starbucks by the my numbers*:

% of males: 45%

% of females: 53%

% of people whose gender could not be easily determined: 2%

# of people drinking Jamba Juice: 4

% of people wearing Stanford apparel: 18%

“For the sake of making everybody’s lives easier, all ISC meetings for the foreseeable future have been moved to Starbucks”

% of people in sorority apparel: 33%

% of people in startup apparel: 21%

# of times the motion-activated doors open on a sunny, warm-ish afternoon: 1-2 times per minute

# of times the motion activated doors open on a frigid, 40-degree morning: 15-30 times per minute

# of laptops: 13

# of macbooks: 13

# of Norah Jones songs played per hour: 3

# of Bob Marley songs played per hour: 5

# of Michael Buble songs played per hour: 3

# of Cannibal Corpse songs played per hour: 0

# of people wearing headphones: 9

# of people who should be wearing headphones: 1 (yes, I’m taking to you, overexcited Skype-date girl)

% of orders appended with the terms “non-fat”, “no-foam”, or “sugar-free”: 25%

# of people who look suspiciously like grad students: 9

# of guys professionally photographing a little girl drinking a frappucino: 1 (yes, this actually happened)

 

*Data observed during several hours on a Saturday afternoon. All numbers are subject to the author’s interpretation and embellishment.

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